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Category:    Home > Reviews > Scorched

Scorched

 

Picture: B     Sound: B     Extras: D     Film: C-

 

 

Alicia Silverstone did not stay on the A-list for long, but it was not because she was not aggressive in wanting to work.  Even after the disaster that remains Joel Schumacher’s unfortunate Batman & Robin, she is out there making films and Scorched (2003) is her latest attempt at a comeback.  Here, she joins Rachel Leigh Cook and Woody Harrelson in a heist, the kind of “bad girl” role she has done one too many of.

 

The problem with this one is that is additionally wants to be an American version of Guy Ritchie’s Scratch (2001), but it far too tired and unoriginal to even think it is in that league.  Every joke in Joe Wein’s screenplay is flatter than the surrounding desert in the film.  Even the twist of several parties planning to rob the same back without knowing the other is up to the same thing.  The problem is that all three parties seem very responsible for their failures in life and you could care less what happens to any of them.  That the bank is called Desert Savings Bank epitomizes the lack of creativity and generic nature of the film, which is practically cable TV filler.  That it later turned out that a division of Blockbuster Video co-produced this mess explained everything.

 

Gavin Grazer is not getting off to any kind of start as a director, but I have seen worse.  If he ever gets to direct again, we can only hope he gets a better script.  Silverstone seems lost, Cooke was underused, Harrelson was underdeveloped, and John Cleese cannot save this.  Cleese is also wasted in this quick paycheck, but it does bring up a vital point:  Cleese is a great comic actor, but just having Cleese show up is NOT sufficient enough to make him funny or add to a film.  He needs and deserves better material than this.  His few jokes are atypically worthless.

 

The DVD comes with an awful pan & scan version and a better, anamorphically enhanced 1.85 X 1 image that is good enough, showing an image that demonstrates it is a recent film.  Often, newer films are short-changed in their transfer, but this one fares better.  The Dolby Digital Stereo is offered in 2.0 Pro Logic surround and a better 5.1 AC-3 mix.  It too demonstrates that it is a recent film production, but is nothing spectacular.  However, the mix has enough moments of interest that DTS would have been a plus, except on the music, which is awful and forgettable.  That goes especially for the bad MTV filler music.  Even The Eels’ “Fresh Feeling” does not work, and it is the only song her that feels like a song.  The only extra is a trailer, so this is a very basic DVD.

 

After finishing this, I felt scorched by how bad the whole thing was.  It is one of those films where you wish it would get better, especially considering the cast, but things just get worse, and worse, and worse, and worse. 

 

 

-   Nicholas Sheffo


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